Retail Life 23

Let me preface this story by letting everyone know that our company’s return policy has changed. Most companies have done this, actually. In light of covid-19, we are not accepting returns or exchanges. Obviously, this has caused quite a few people to get angry. Even with the sign posted right on the register on a big orange piece of paper, we should apparently say, “have a nice day, by the way you can’t return this,” to every customer.  

In some cases, I’ll do the return. For example, if it’s something broken and I will damage it out anyway, then I will let them return it and get something else. But if it’s just clothes they didn’t like, or curtains that didn’t match, or a framed picture they just didn’t need… I can’t do it. If it’s able to be resold, I can’t do the return. Because if the people had been sick or were around someone who was, and then brought an item back to the store, the germs would be on the item and then it spreads to the next person to buy it the item. I try to be polite. I tell them to just hold on to the receipt and we’ll honor the return when we’re able to. But that’s not always good enough.  

I had a customer today that was pretty interesting to say the least. First, I’d like to say that she was a grown woman. Not fat, but also not a twig. She had a butt, is what I’m getting at here. And she bought a pair of shorts that were size 7/8 in GIRLS. At the time, I thought nothing of it. Totally possible she was buying the shorts for someone else. Her daughter, niece, friend’s child, etc. But then she came back about an hour later and wanted to exchange them because they didn’t fit.  

I really wanted to say, “of course they didn’t fit! Did you even look at what you grabbed? They’re probably as big around as your thigh! Come on!” But instead, I said, “I’m sorry, we’re not allowed to do returns or exchanges right now.” 

Her response was, “Well then, can I just get my money back?” 

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes and said, “We’re not allowed to do any returns or exchanges right now.” And then I pointed to the sign right next to my face.  

And she said, “Ugh, you’ve got to be f*cking kidding me.” And angrily left the store.  

Now, I guess while she was talking to me, her boyfriend had also come in the store. And he’d locked the car. Because she then yanked really hard on the locked door and almost fell over.  

My favorite part of angry customers is watching how they act in the parking lot, and that made the entire interaction worth it.  

After a minute of her huffing and puffing in the parking lot, she came back in to find her boyfriend. And she loudly complained to him about how I wouldn’t let her exchange the shorts. I’m guessing she wanted him to come yell at me and make me do it. But my resting b*tch face was on point today and he just looked at me and then told her he’d just buy her the other pair of shorts. Two wins for me today.  

I would also like to point out that she brought a beer in to the store with her and I had to tell her to leave it outside. Another customer also had to ask her to back up because she’s supposed to be 6ft away, not right behind her in line. So, the chances of her being intoxicated were high. And maybe that was the root of the problem with her not picking shorts that would actually fit her.  

I’m sure this will not be the last issue I have with the refund policy. It wasn’t even the last time someone was mad today. But at least I got a good laugh out of the whole thing.  

And speaking of drinking in the store… Had to let my new cashier go because he decided it would be an excellent idea to chug two buzz balls in the middle of his shift. If you don’t know what buzz balls are, just know that they have a very high alcohol content. They get you buzzed 😉  

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