What if…streetlights could talk?

Coming up to a red light a little too fast… “Hey! Slow your roll!!”

Tina slammed on her brakes and her car jerked to a stop.

“Could have caused an accident! What’s your problem?” The turn light shook in anger.

“Sorry,” Tina said but of course they couldn’t hear her with her windows up.

“Get off your phone!”

Tina looked to her left and saw her neighbor at the light jump and drop their phone to their lap. She giggled and the light turned green.


Across town a shiny black car was weaving in and out of traffic. “Here he comes,” said the middle light. “On three.”

A small car honked as the crazed driver nearly took off her bumper. “One.”

A truck slammed to a stop to let him pass. “Two.”

Pedestrians jumped back from the curb as water and debris was flung into the air. “three-“

“STOP!” All three lights yelled.

The black car braked but one tire was still slick from a puddle and he spun halfway through the intersection before the car stalled out. The streetlights cackled with glee as traffic began to move around his car.


Near the highway, a car inched forward to turn right on red. There were cars speeding over the bridge but it looked like he wanted to risk it anyway.

“Don’t even think about it, bud,” the light grumbled. The driver stuck his nose out further and was about to hit the gas, “I said don’t!” Joe stopped and looked up to glare at the light as the flood of cars sped past him, way too close for comfort.

“I could have made it,” Joe argued, flipping off the light.

A camera flashed and took a picture. “Tell it to a judge.”


Downtown, slightly intoxicated pedestrians waited at a crosswalk. The light was eyeing them wearily as cars made their way through the streets. They didn’t seem to be aware of the walk symbol blinking at them as one man told a joke and they all laughed.

The light turned green and “don’t walk” now flashed from the monitor. “Where are we going?” Todd the jokester asked.

“Food, let’s get food!” Lisa, the blonde on his arm, pleaded.

“Food it is, let’s roll!” Todd took one step off the curb, Lisa trailing next to him.

“Get back!” the light yelled, a larger truck coming towards them.

Todd looked up and jumped off the street, pulling Lisa out of the way just in time.

“That was close,” Todd looked a little shaken but tried to laugh it off. They checked the street this time before crossing and made it to the lot with their car.

“Idiots,” the light took a picture of their license plate and sent it to a cop on duty in the neighborhood.