Retail Rant

Oh my goodness. I swear there was something in the water the other day. The people in my city were drinking the stupid juice or something. Every other customer forgot their brain at home and it was somehow my fault. Let’s break it down.

  1. A woman was buying a handful of items. She had two rolls of duct tape and they had stuck together. So, I unstuck them, scanned them individually, and put them in the bag. She paid and left.
    But then she came back. “You charged me twice for that duct tape.”
    “No, it was two individual rolls.”
    “No, it’s a two pack.”
    “No, it’s two rolls.”
    Back and forth several times before she changes her argument to, “So, it’s $6 for one roll of duct tape?”
    “Yes.” Mind you, it’s the most expensive duct tape we have and a really large roll. It’s worth the money.
    “That’s ridiculous. I don’t want to pay $6 for one roll.”
    “So, it’s $12 for two rolls of duct tape?”
    “Yes.” That is indeed how math works.
    “I’m going to return it then.”
    She goes back to her car to get the bag and comes in with the TWO INDIVIDUAL ROLLS OF TAPE. “Oh, I’m sorry. It is two rolls.”
    Did you still not believe me??????
  2. A woman walks in and says, “How much are your balloons?”
    “They range from $1 to $5.”
    “Okay. I need a birthday one.”
    “Okay, which one?”
    “One that says happy birthday.”
    I turn to look at the display board of balloons. I stare at the EIGHT DIFFERENT BALLOONS THAT SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY. WITH NUMBERS ON THEM FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE. “Which one?”
    “The one that says Happy birthday.” Gestures vaguely.
    “But which one?”
    “The one on the end.”
    “The big one that’s $5?”
    Seriously, this went on for far too long before she finally said which one she wanted. I can’t make this up.
  3. And then a man walks in and looks around before asking, “Did I leave a truck battery here to charge?”
    “Um. No.”
    “Are you sure?”
    “Yes. I’m sure.” Duh.
    “It would have been this morning.”
    “Yup, and I’ve been here all day. No battery here.”
    “Oh. I guess I’ll check next door.”
    Next door is an auto store. That would have been my first guess. But what do I know?

And then a few other little things like insisting her card has a chip even though I can clearly see it didn’t. But she wanted to insert it three times before swiping it anyway.
And another woman complaining about the $4 fee the add money to a prepaid card. Except it wasn’t even her loading the card. It was the woman in line in front of her. A complete stranger. And when the stranger said “Well, it’s free at Walgreens but I didn’t want to drive to Cleburne.” And she says, “Psh, i would have, but I guess that’s just me.”
Like ma’am. Do you know how much gas you would use to drive to Cleburne and back? Way more than the $4 fee. But go off.

I seriously can’t wait until I can stop working in retail.